I’ve been practicing yoga for over 2 years now. It’s something I got into after I quit my full-time job for its obvious benefits: weight-loss, increased muscle strength, balanced metabolism and most of all, a calmer mind. God knows we need a calmer mind once we have babies.
So anyway, the sessions are mostly held at my place and in the morning hours during the week. This week, however, our all-ladies group decided to have one on a Saturday morning instead, with the objective of roping in our better halves. While the intention was great, the class in itself was quite a revelation. This Saturday was when I learned why I’m not gaga about yoga with the husband.
- At the mention of the class, the first thing he did was purchase some appropriate (read: branded) yoga gear. While I consider that a splurge of his hard-earned money, I had no heart to curb his short-lived enthusiasm. Neither did I have the audacity to tell him that even after 2 years of practicing yoga, I’m still managing in plain Jane clothes (read: cotton t-shirts and leggings).
- My otherwise astute husband has a certain weakness when it comes to his internal compass. As a result of this, right=left and left=right in his vocabulary, especially at times of pressure. Given the type of commands one needs to follow in a yoga class, it came as no surprise then that this well-kept secret of his was revealed within the first 5 minutes itself!!
- Besides bending, twisting and a lot of moving around, yoga is largely about striking difficult poses and the level of difficulty goes a notch higher when those poses need to be held for a certain amount of time. For first-timers in a class of regulars, this translates into ‘awkward movements’ and embarrassing bodily sounds such as cracking knees and exasperated sighs in a quiet environment. Not a pretty sight, I say. On the plus side though, it just means you’re doing it right.
- Yoga poses have complicated Sanskrit names which when translated into English, can sound very funny. For example, each time the teacher said ‘downward facing Dog’ (Adho Mukha Svanasana) or ‘Cobra pose’ (Bujangasana) or ‘Corpse pose’ (Savasana), I heard a chuckle and saw a smirk. And not to forget his reaction to statements like ‘Shine your buttocks to the sky’ or ‘Exhale out of your toenails’. Say what?
- A typical session of Hatha yoga can be quite strenuous. But naturally, we were exhausted at the end of the session. Not so much though that I could not have a hot shower, prepare lunch, feed my daughter, clear the dishes and read to her right after. As for my husband, all he did was sleep through the afternoon. Oh, and book himself a massage appointment for the evening 😉
Jokes apart – Dear husband, if you’re reading this, I’m proud of what you’ve achieved this weekend. Don’t worry about the sweet pain; it will subside in a couple of days. It takes motivation to join an advanced class as a newbie and sail through it. More so, it takes exceptional determination to join in on a class with your wife considering she would be judging you every breathing moment. Nevertheless, you did it. Just one request though – going forward, let’s do it separately.
Your supportive wife.